7x18 Comment-fic Meme

[glovered]

Hello! lazy_daze and I have decided that the time for comment-fic is now. In this past episode, Sam and Dean get shwasted Dean says, "I miss these talks." However, we do not see said talk on-screen.

AND THUS, THE INCEPTION OF:

Pimp: <a href="http://glovered.livejournal.com/69377.html"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/PU5jY.jpg" border="0"></a> RULES: (you know how this works) 1. Be Nice To Each Other. 2. Prompts should in some way have to do with Sam and Dean drinking together, things covered in this scene, or things they haven't talked about in a while or something? I don't care too much, tbh. 3. Use any and all characters you want! (RPF welcome so long as it pertains to this scene) 4. Art is also welcome, of course. 5. Prompt with abandon and fill things, too!

Fills
Sam forgets how his inhibitions are lowered and really does tell Dean everything Hallucifer used to say, including the lewd comments about Dean. by runedgirl

Sam usually would never agree to let Dean fuck him in a back alley behind a bar but hey, he's drunk and so is Dean and it seems like a really good idea right now. by juice817

This kind of sloppy, wet making out is really good. And, it turns out, Sam is a mouthy, filthy little fucker when he's horny and wasted. by lazy_daze

Sam, Dean, and some drunk baking. I would imagine a lot more of the food would end up on the floor rather than in the oven, though. (first fill) by bertee

Sam, Dean, and some drunk baking. I would imagine a lot more of the food would end up on the floor rather than in the oven, though. (second fill) by glovered

There are a number of reasons they mututally agreed that getting drunk together was a bad idea. But Sam had sort of forgotten the exact kind of bad idea it was until the words 'body shots' came up. by runedgirl

The problem is, when Dean gets drunk he thinks all Sam's ideas are smart. Even when they're really, really not. by de_nugis

"My lips feel numb, Dean. Are your lips numb? Mine are really numb." by afattribble

Sam's big brother knows everything there is to know about anything. Also, he's always right. Also, all his ideas are flawless and need implementing. Immediately. by orbiting_saturn

Sam drunkenly decides it's time to confess that he dug Dean's amulet out of the trash can two years ago after Dean rashly discarded it. by verucasalt123

Sam is an affectionate, grabby, earnest drunk, all big dreams and world peace and "I just...I feel like everyone should just get along, Dean, y'know?" by tiptoe39

Dean goes on a tangent about Castiel's mouth. ...Dean slurs a bit and says something along the lines of "Christ, those fucking lips." by bertee

Filming scenes like this is a real hardship. (rpf?) by novella34

Sam gets climby when he's drunk, and Dean mostly follows him around in a grumpy stumble to make sure he doesn't hurt himself. by akadougal

Dean decides baby bro is old enough to have a beer. He didn't know it would hit him so hard. by obstinatrix

Dean decides to refill his flask with that awesome, and really expensive-looking, booze. He leaves the flask out, forcing ghost!Bobby to witness whatever shenanigans ensue. by salacious_newt

Sam gets all handsy and affectionate when he's drunk. Dean's too drunk to remember why he's not supposed to enjoy that. by lavishsqualor

Sam gets REALLY horny when drunk. It's a problem. by orbiting_saturn

Well isn't this just the prettiest mental picture that ever was! by glovered

drunk!Sam obsesses about Dean's freckles. Dean will have none of it, thank you, his freckles are not cute or pretty or precious, they are rugged and manly. (fill one!) by glovered

drunk!Sam obsesses about Dean's freckles. Dean will have none of it, thank you, his freckles are not cute or pretty or precious, they are rugged and manly. (fill two!) by oddishly

Tell me if I miss any, and have a good day!

Comments

[tiptoe39.livejournal.com]

(Continuing with the theme of whit_merule's post above...)

Dean goes on a tangent about Castiel's mouth. Don't really care if it ends up with Wincest or Dean/Cas by proxy or whatever, just so long as Dean slurs a bit and says something along the lines of "Christ, those fucking lips." Sam's reaction is up to author, too :)

[bertee.livejournal.com]

I'M REALLY REALLY SORRY. this is probably not what you were after. SORRYYYY. /o\


"I don't get it."

Dean's voice was slurred from his last four measures of scotch, and Sam felt the room swim around his ears as he looked over to where Dean was sitting with his feet propped up on the desk. "Don't get what?"

Dean held up a finger for a brief pause while he burped. "Cas."

Sam frowned. "What don't you get? He took the hallucinations out of my head into his."

Dean waved his hand. "No." He crinkled his nose. "Okay, I don't really get that either but I ain't looking in that gift horse's mouth."

"Am I the gift horse?" Sam asked his scotch.

"Maybe?" Dean furrowed his brow. "No, wait, Cas is the gift horse." He flailed his arm a little in triumph and repeated, "Cas is the gift horse! And he has a mouth. That I don't get."

Fighting his way through the sea of scotch currently filling his head, Sam considered Castiel's mouth. It wasn't like the big leviathan chomp-mouths, which Sam definitely didn't get; it was just a normal, person-mouth. "Why don't you get his mouth?"

"Because an angel shouldn't have a mouth like that," Dean said, sounding personally aggrieved that the universe had allowed Castiel's mouth to come into being. "Right?"

Sam had no strong feelings about Castiel's mouth one way or the other. "Uh, yes?" he guessed. "No. Maybe?" He'd had too much to drink to be fielding difficult questions like this. "I have no idea what the right answer is here, dude."

Dean ignored him as he let out a sigh. "His lips..."

Sam shuffled his chair a few inches away from Dean. "Do you want some privacy while you sigh about Cas' lips?"

"Shut up." Dean muttered. He sloshed his drink clumsily in the glass, apparently not caring how it spilled over onto his fingers. "He's got superpowers. He can time travel and pull people out of Hell and wipe people's minds like that magic light thing from Men in Black. He lives in goddamn Heaven!" he said loudly before slumping back in his chair and looking over at Sam, genuinely confused. "Is there no chapstick in Heaven?"

Sam blinked.

Dean stared at him, evidently waiting for an answer.

"You're complaining about Cas' lips?" he ventured, lost.

"He's an angel!" Dean said again, as though that explained everything. "All the rest of the angels had good lips. Were they hiding the chapstick from him?"

He sounded very sad about this. Sam was a little concerned.

"He was fighting a war, Dean. Maybe he didn't have time to look after his vessel?" he suggested hopefully.

"We fight things every day!" Dean protested. "You still have time to use that fancy nozzle thing on your hairdryer-"

"Diffuser."

"And our eyebrows always look good, and I always find time to use some blistex if I need it." He slapped Sam on the shoulder and said seriously, "We gotta look sharp, Sammy."

"Maybe Cas has different values," Sam hazarded. "I mean, compared to the rest of the angels, he's bad at human stuff. Maybe non-chapped lips are one of the things he doesn't get. Like cell phones, or the appropriate time to put your hand inside someone."

[bertee.livejournal.com]

"But he died!" Dean said. (If Sam was being honest, it was closer to a wail at this point.) "Twice!"

Sam downed some more scotch. "Three times if you count the lake."

"And every time God or the leviathans or whatever else healed every single atom of him."

"I don't think you can heal ato-"

"And what, they couldn't smooth out his lips while they were doing it? "Oh, hey, Sam and Dean, I can resurrect your angel buddy, no sweat, but chapstick is just a step too far"?" Dean took a gulp of scotch and glowered at Sam's shoes. "Assholes."

"You ever wonder if maybe you're thinking too much about this?"

"How'm I not supposed to think about it, man?" Dean said. "The guy's allergic to personal space and his mouth is always right here." He waved his hand in Sam's face in demonstration. "I can't help it."

He dropped his head to the side to rest on Sam's shoulder and let out a melodramatic sigh.

Sam patted him on the head. "It's okay."

"I don't get it," Dean said mournfully. "I just don't get it, Sam."

Given the amount of friends they'd buried over the years, seeing his brother drunk and melancholy wasn't a new experience for Sam. Seeing Dean so melancholy about a lack of chapstick, on the other hand, was strange and unsettling.

"I tried," Dean mumbled. "I offered him some of mine. I kept putting it on in front of him so he'd take the hint."

Sam patted him again as Dean moved closer, slinging his leg clumsily over Sam's. "I'm guessing it didn't take?"

Dean shook his head. "I even put some in his trenchcoat," he said, practically sitting on Sam's lap. "I put some Carmex in every pocket he had. I figured he might get bored one day and give it a shot. Like he did with deodorant. And with jacking off."

"No dice?"

"No dice," Dean repeated sadly. "Christ, his fucking lips, Sam."

Sam didn't think he'd seen him this depressed since Bobby died. Apparently the chappedness of Castiel's lips had grave consequences.

"Hey," he said, coaxing Dean's head up. "He's with Meg now. Maybe she can put some on for him."

Dean brightened at that. "She had nice lips when she kissed me that one time."

"Exactly," Sam said. Maybe there was an upside to Castiel being trapped in a mental institution, after all. "I'm sure Meg's got it covered."

Dean seemed to calm down a little at that. His plump, soft, and entirely unchapped lower lip was still stuck out in a half-pout and Sam couldn't resist leaning in as he asked, "So can I kiss you right now, or...?"

His question was answered when Dean pulled him forward to press their lips together. He climbed astride Sam's lap, both of them too drunk and lazy and uncoordinated to manage anything more than a messy crush of lips and tongue, and Sam let himself sink happily into the hazy contact, satisfied by the warmth of Dean's body against his.

Of all the drunken talks they'd shared, this definitely ranked somewhere in the top five weirdest.

[akadougal.livejournal.com]

I could quote all of this back at you as "the funniest". Just. YES.

[tiptoe39.livejournal.com]

OH HEI AND THEN THERE BE BONUS KISSING. I AM DOUBLY IMPRESSED. :D

[tebtosca.livejournal.com]

"I put some Carmex in every pocket he had. I figured he might get bored one day and give it a shot. Like he did with deodorant. And with jacking off."

Dead of the lulz

[angelicfoodcake.livejournal.com]

AHAHAHAA :D I loved Dean's unsuccessful tries to get Castiel to use some chapstick ♥

[obstinatrix.livejournal.com]

brb weeping with laughter

[glovered.livejournal.com]

"I don't get it," Dean said mournfully. "I just don't get it, Sam."

There comes a moment in every person's life when they have to accept and move on. Poor Dean. Also, bonus points for mentioning S & D's toilette. I think about Sam's hair a lot and whether he straightens his hair or what. So happy.

[roque-clasique.livejournal.com]

YESSSS this cracked me UP!

[salty-catfish.livejournal.com]

tears of laughterrr

[tiptoe39.livejournal.com]

ppppfffffffffffffffffffffft this is perfect and i have no complaints!!!! XDDDD poor cas and his constantly chapped lips!! say, you don't read The Home Planet's recaps, do you? My bb tebtosca is constantly on about Cas needing chapstick!!

You have nothing to apologize for. I snorted! :DDD

[whit-merule.livejournal.com]

Oh not the other angels are hiding the chapstick from him! :(

I do not know where this madness comes from but I would like to visit there.